My pants almost fit

This morning, the weather forecast was not so warm. I decided to break out a pair of fall/winter pants. As I pulled them off the hanger, I said a slow prayer to myself hoping that they would fit. "Dear G-d - I promise I will work out more if you just please please please please please let these pants fit me today." and they did. But as the day has gone on, I find myself more and more uncomfortable in these pants. I also have a bit of a belly hanging over them! Holy shit people (and by people I really mean my loyal fans Dave and Selin)! I have a belly! It's official... Call Maury, I am going to be need someone to cut open my patio doors and airlift me to a nearby hospital where I will have gastric bypass surgery.

I have just checked the weather forecast for the weekend. TO looks pretty good to me, alternating between sun & rain with temperatures in the mid-teens low 20's. Where did summer go? I didn't spend nearly enough time outside... I spent a total of 2 days in a bathing suit (which btw is still MIA - ALL I WANT IS MY BATHING SUIT BACK!! I AM WILLING TO PAY A RANSOM FOR IT)... And my hair got lighter.

Everyone needs to see the movie "Little Miss Sunshine." In fact, I think I need to see it again because it put me in the most fantastic mood that I've been in in a long time (ok, maybe the company had something to do with it, but I like to believe it was all about the movie). Made me laugh until I thought I would piss myself. Now that would have been embarrassing.

Also - I am on chapter 13 of "The Hollow Chocolate Bunnies of the Apocolypse. The suggestion I got was not a lie - this is so far the funniest book I have ever read. So funny that I am having a difficult time taking it seriously. I'm following a teady bear and a 13 year old on a murder mystery to solve the serial killings of humpty dumpty, little boy blue and g-d knows who else will die before this book is over. I can't wait to get home and read it tonight. This is a book for adults - not children... It's got booze, and sex (yes talking teady bears have sex too...), and innapropriate language... Love it!

I wish Val would send me pics from her bday this weekend... There seemed to be some pretty nice ones... But she's lazy. Poop on her.

My brain is mush

I had a lot of things on my mind today... I've been having trouble keeping them organized and have decided that I must have a little bit of adult ADD.

The things I thought about today:

1. I want to buy Kinky Freidman's old albums from when he was with his band the "Texas Jewboys"
2. Maclean's magazine actually has some interesting articles in it (sometimes)
3. I really want to go home (this has been my thought since I left my house at 7:45am)
4. I am hungry
5. I think guys suck today
6. I actually have a lot of work to do, but am having trouble getting my shit together
7. Is it Friday yet? I want to leave and drive to TO already...

Taking book suggestions from a boy

A few weeks ago, I found myself in a heavy book discussion with a guy I had just met. Now, I love to read, and will generally give anything a try but I found myself in Chapters yesterday confused. I used to work there, and know the place inside out, but I ventured into unchartered female territory. The sci-fi and fantasy section.

I picked up two books from this stranger's recommendations. One about a wizard who is also a police detective, and one about Toy City where all the fairy tale characters are slowly being murdered by a serial killer. I started to read one last night and it is hilarious. Don't tell anyone...

My dad wants to borrow them when I am finished (of course).

Also - I would like to point out that last weekend I had two dates, and this weekend I saw two ex boyfriends. Poop.

I bought condoms for my little brother at Costco

Yes - you are reading correctly. I bought my 20 year old brother condoms. At Costco. And my parents were with me. Silly kid - too shy to buy them himself. I tried to explain that if he was old enough to have sex, he was old enough to buy condoms. Can you imagine "Hey baby - I got 3 boxes at Costco... My big sister picked them up for us." I would NOT be impressed.

It happened as we were walking up a food aisle munching on sausage samples. He said "Can you buy me condoms?" I said "what?" he said "condoms. I'm too shy to buy them myself. Just tell mom and dad they're for you." BUT I'M NOT HAVING SEX WITH ANYONE!! Isn't it a little suspicious... "Hey mom and dad - I'm just going to toss this multi-pack of condoms into the cart just in case I start having crazy sex in the near future." right...

My brother left Costco to go meet his girlfriend leaving me alone with the rents and the task of buying condoms inconspicuously... I said to my mom "so... How's Corey doing with Becky??" "Good... I can't believe it's been three months already." "Wow..." "Ya, she seems like a really nice girl..." "Ya - so have you guys had a talk with him at all?" "A talk?" "Ya... you know a talk." "Larry - come over here..." oops... not where i intended that to go...

To make a very long - but funny story short. We bought the condoms for my brother. My mom knew they weren't for me... My friend Simon came over. I couldn't resist telling him the story. I left a note taped to the boxes that read "Hey dude - have fun & be safe! Love Tamara & Simon (and mom and dad)...

Ha! What a night... until Simon and I realized my baby brother is having more sex than both of us.

Putting a picture on this blog is a pain in my ass

I've been trying to figure out how to post a picture in my profile section. I'm not having an easy time with it. There are so many more interesting things I want to write about, but here I am whining about my lack of tech knowledge when I usually consider myself to be quite tech savvy. If only this were an Excel spreadsheet. I'd be ok in no time!


OK - So I have uploaded a photo and will go to the next step. Please wish me luck! If you see something as my profile photo, we will all know that this was a huge success. Otherwise, I'm an idiot.

I did it!!! It works!!! Now all I need is to figure out how to do it from my Flickr photos... Now there's a new project...